I’ve always prided myself in being semi-crunchy-granola – creating a DIY fix for almost any household problem, upcycling everyday items in cute and useful ways, being queen of clearance and thrift store fashion, showering a little less frequently than “normal” by American standards, loving both my with and without make-up faces… you get the point. But, after I (finally) graduated college something changed. [insert mind-screwing economic crisis].
At a time when unemployment soared and the job market crashed, when people were struggling to obtain or keep any sense of financial security, when doom and gloom plastered the 5 o’clock news, I took a series of part-time jobs, worked 60+ hours a week, and was sincerely grateful to be able to eat and pay some way overdue bills. Stressed and over-exhausted, *BAM* Corporate America unexpectedly came knocking at my door. And let me tell you, the sound of a steady paycheck, health insurance, and paid vacation days sounded oh so much more important than say, retaining my crunchy-granola soul. It’s amazing how not-so-slowly sitting at a desk, suffocating under mounds of paperwork, taking orders from people who devoted their lives to a profession I have little respect for, made it easy to slip further and further into Rantville. And, here I am: stuck. (Don’t get me wrong, I have been known to love a good, blood boiling, self-righteous, soap box rant just as much as the next disgruntled employee. But, this continuous life-loathing has gotten more than a bit out of control.)
So, rather than sit and idly bitch about all the petty bullshit of the office world I both hate and yet depend on, I want to focus on the positive – on what I can do to either modify the things I am so unhappy about, or better yet my attitude toward them.
The line between taking a stand and participating in a necessary evil are far too blurry at the moment. Half the time I want to sell all my material possessions and go off the grid à la Into the Wild or whatever. The rest of the time, I want a huge house with a white picket fence and a cookie-cutter size 2 body. (That ideal is so very far from the person I am meant to be. My mind is turning into stereotypical American Dream mush, and I don’t like it one bit!)
For me, this blog will be a place to “check in” with myself. To re-inspire and reclaim the creativity and passion that is so deeply lacking from my life these days. All this is in hopes that I will become a little less cranky, live a life a little more fulfilling, and distinguish a much less fuzzy line between the problem and the solution.